Interestingly, if we invade North Korea because it caused us to miss a movie, that still won't be the worst reason we ever went to war.

@thesouthernlife: CBS: "Tom Petty is dead." Tom Petty: "Don't do me like that."

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@FSUSteve: My mom just replied to my text with "K." Whooooaaa busy lady, is there some emergency over on FarmVille?

@VanGobot: Judge: Guilty! *bangs gavel* NINE MONTHS LATER *gavel holding freaky gavel-human hybrid baby* Judge: *tears welling up* ..he has your eyes

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@ashgrash: Ok, but like, how married are you?

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@brunopieroni: A search party sounds like a fun way to look for someone.

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