@jenstatsky: Is a bath relaxing for Michael Phelps or does it just feel like he's at work
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@AtticusFinch79: 🎶I'm going to wash that man right out of my hair🎶 *tiny little man falls out of my hair with a gentle thud* Him: Is that a new shampoo?
@LostFelicia: Raise your hand if you ever ran out of toilet paper and had to use a coffee filter. So, just me..
@samalmightysam: Grab a plate and throw it on the floor. Did it break? Yes? Ok, now tell it you're sorry. Good, now, did it unbreak? No? Now you understand.