@Blarebare: Is Vanilla Ice's son named Vanilla Extract? Cuz he should be.
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@trevso_electric: If I were a manager at Stabucks I would be like, "You showed up latte for work today!" then when the laughing stops, "but no, you're fired."
@curlycomedy: At a restaurant I thought a family was praying at the table but then I realized they were all texting.
@SortaBad: [babysitting] Ok well sorry I threw all your kid's toys into the ocean but maybe next time be more clear if you suggest we have a tea party