@insanelynormal1: It all went downhill when he texted me he's abscessed with me.
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@peachesanscream: What if your dog speaks French and this whole time has been asking you for some beef?
@iGreenMonk: I got a dog and named it "Twenty Miles". This way I can tell people that I walk twenty miles everyday.
@SCbchbum: Thanks for warning me to be careful after I slipped & fell. I'll be sure to wish you luck on your lab test results at your funeral.