@KentTheG: It costs today's parents $235,000 to raise a child. And that's just for the alcohol.
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@literalporn: WHITE PEOPLE COLONIZED AND ENSLAVED THE WORLD IN SEARCH OF SPICES AND DIDN'T USE A DAMN ONE
@TheCareBare: she's all "don't sleep in the nude- what if there's a fire and the fire men come and see you naked" uh you pretty much described my fantasy
@ThingsJackDigs: Barista: got a latte for “Batman”! Is there a “Batman” here? *everyone looks at me* Me [dressed as Batman]: that's not me, my name is Jack
@GrrrRach: I've spent three hours investigating this chicken and I still can't find his nuggets.