@Tom_Vom: It sounded like someone on a moped was approaching but it turned out to be 1,000 bees on a regular bicycle.
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@Pappiness: Eric Trump said the Syria strike was swayed by a "heartbroken" Ivanka. He also pouted that dad has never bombed a country for him.
@hyperblastchic: Me singing: Then I saw her face!! Now I'm a Beliber! Not a trace of doubt in my mind! Roommate: You DO know that's a guy...right?
@GrrrRach: I've spent three hours investigating this chicken and I still can't find his nuggets.
@AnkCoupleTO: "I'm so sorry" "No, I'm really sorry" "No, I'm even sorrier than you" "No, I'm the sorriest ever!" *mutual hug* -Canadian rap battle