@TomSchally: It's adorable how I write “beer” on my shopping list like I'd somehow forget.
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@mstern68: [Interview] Me: I really need the paycheck Him: This is an unpaid internship. Me: Do you provide snacks? Him: Um, yes Me: Keep going...
@KarenKilgariff: My sister teaches 1st grade. A boy in her class had a tantrum and screamed "I hate you!" and she gently replied "I know. It doesn't matter."
@GrillinChillin9: Urban Dictionary: Helping white folks figure out if they're getting insulted or complimented daily.