@Twits_Giggles: It's amazing how patiently people will wait in line behind you when you're buying tampons.
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@Sean_Burgundy_: Waitress: Would you prefer your order with a side of fries or salad? Me: Would you prefer your tip with cash or advice?
@zachreinert03: If a genie granted me 3 wishes I'd ask for unlimited wishes, then I'd probably take a nap
@markleggett: In America she's called "Miley" Cyrus, but in other countries she's called "What America would be like if it were a person".