@NintenDom: It's Facebook's 10th birthday today. Let's all click "Maybe" on the event invite and then not show up.
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@SCbchbum: Seriously, if I were a manager at Burger King, my answer to every complaint would be, “You’re at Burger King.”
@machiavellino: (i go up to lady pushing baby in stroller and put my foot up on the stroller to address the baby) hey baby... is this woman bothering you
@longwall26: No self-respecting murderer is going to have the patience to stand there for the twenty or thirty hours it'll take me to dig my own grave.