@primawesome: It's uncool to be religious. It's uncool to be atheist. If someone asks what you believe in just say Beyoncé. It's the only way to be safe.
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@FrenulumBreve: PIGEON MAGICIAN: I want you to pick a car, any car...DONT TELL ME!. Ok [shits on windscreen] is THIS the car you chose?
@theshantilly: Me: I want cozy pajama pants for Christmas. Him: I was gonna get lingerie. Me: Trust me. VS won't have your size. Him: Me: *jazz hands*