@tkhan74: I've been calling my wife "honey" for 12 years because I don't know how to tell her I forgot her name.
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@AndyAsAdjective: A popsicle stick makes a great bookmark. But eat the popsicle first. Don't make the same mistake I did.
@SuperJuanderer: if you took every species of rattlesnake in the US and laid them end to end, I would yell at a safe distance, "STOP DOING THAT!"
@thedayofthedot: there is nothing wrong with being nice, but there is something wrong with being nice to people.
@Cpin42: I hate when I show up to a funeral and another guy is wearing the same hot dog costume.