@hatehug: I've been listening to Pink Floyd for the past 2 hours. I'm about to just go ahead and skip to track 2.
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@MissNaughty1801: I imagine some people are like...: 'should I take the shower?...no...I'm taking the train today...'
@PwrFulWmn: You attract more men when you smell like butter, sautéed ham and onions than any expensive perfume.
@DanMentos: "Your son's been involved in a shenanigan" What kinda shenanigans? "It was just one shenanigan" You called me down here for one shenanigan?
@hippieswordfish: [1st date] *stuffing face* sorry i eat a lot when im nervous 'u know ur eating a candle right?' yah *points to napkin* u gonna finish that