@shkeeber: I've been standing in IKEA with a lamp shade on my head for 3 days, hiding from the cops.
@BrandonEsWolf: ME: How fresh is the "fresh octopus"?
WAITER: The chef is fighting it right now.
@msdanifernandez: Little Mermaid: I want to be where the people are
Me: trust me u dont
@donni: "I'm in the best shape of my life!" -Newborn baby
Ah, let us behold the majesty of the Bald eagle. And let us acknowledge the social awkwardness of the Combover eagle.
@Marlebean: The biggest threat of punishment for my daughter is saying I'll pick out her clothes for school.