@CPajamaShark: I've got this great joke where I kidnap people's sticker families and leave little post-it ransom notes. Adorable or horrifying? You decide
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@sarcasticmommy4: I saw a lady jogging in the rain & I was like, "how sad, she doesn't know she could be sleeping in her bed right now."
@TomTheWicked: Boss: What's for lunch? Me: Food. B: What kind of food? M: The kind you eat. B: ... M: ... B: ... Me: You hired me. This is your fault.
@JohnLyonTweets: I like to walk up to strangers and ask, "Would you take a photo of me?" If they say yes I hand them a photo of me and walk away.