@baycontaco: I've started picking up dudes by walking into Starbucks and "accidentally" dropping my recipe for bacon tacos.
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@khook32: One of these days you'll see the real me. Probably next week. I'm almost out of concealer.
@JohnHilsen: You gotta admit that humans are the ultimate #1 lifeform because we're essentially half mermaid but we also have legs for kicking and stuff.
@FavoritesYou: Why do people say its not you... it's me in a breakup? Yeah it's YOU, you're an idiot! I'm amazing... ask your brother!