@ElleOhHell: Jared Leto's primary preparation for his role as the Joker was changing his middle name to Stil
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@ComedicBust: When my wife dressed up as Catwoman, I didn't know it'd mean she'd quit her job, sleep 23 hrs a day and spend the other hour licking herself
@Parentpains: I wanna be the reason you get out of bed in the morning, even if it is to make sure the door is locked.
@NewDadNotes: [first day as a drug dealer] Buyer: got any Morphine? Me: I’m gonna be honest with you [searching through fannypack] I don’t know what Feen is.
@CauseWereGuys: The name CONstitution sounds so negative. Since 'pro' is the opposite of 'con' we should call it prosti..... oh wait.