@annievictorias: Jennifer Aniston is one divorce away from being Ross
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@eff_yeah_steph: Parenting is just putting throw pillows back on the couch every ten minutes until you die.
@Kendragarden: The waitress said they were out of pizza but then much later I saw a pizza come out to another table. (My super villain origin story)
@david8hughes: [at ultrasound] Nurse: there it is. There's your baby Me visibly relieved: oh Jesus thank u Wife whispering to nurse: he thought it was bees