@ilovepie84: "Jesus take the wheel" -an Asian man telling the police that a Mexican guy stole his rims off his Honda Civic.
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@patnspankme: I don't know if this is a good idea. Narrator: He knew, in fact, it was an awful idea.
@TheBoydP: “Wow, this toilet is really uncomfortable…” ~Me drunk in the hot tub as my guests throw themselves out
@TheCiscoKidder: The length of time toddlers stare at each other on the playground would get you stabbed if you did that shit as an adult.