@Adar79Angie: Joined a gym once. 12 bystanders were injured. So much blood. 2 people renounced their faith. At night I still hear the treadmill screaming.
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@flashember: DISH FATHER: You can NEVER see that spoon again! *daughter dish starts sobbing* [outside the window, Spoon is thinking] we leave tonight
@causticbob: USA lose graciously to Belgium in the World Cup. Obama says no hard feelings & any drones heading towards Belgium are nothing to worry about
@chewlongkok_: [On phone to police] Has there been a report of a pervert in the park? P: No, there hasn't. Me: oh good. [Goes back to hiding in bushes]