@One_FineMess: Just did a spot on imitation of a new born calf while trying to gracefully exit a hammock.
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@BillPelicanBros: Cop: You were speeding so I'm going to be giving you a ticket Me: Ooh, could I win something Cop: Sort of, 2 more of these & you get a bike
@jlock17: So annoying how every time I go to sleep, my wife starts whispering into my ear "Go towards the light."
@polychromatik: Do you ever wake up. Kiss the person beside you, and just be thankful to be alive. I did. Not really appreciated on flights apparently