@Coops_Bradley: Just found out I'm pregnant. At least that's what this expectant mother sign for my parking spot says.
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@Scott_A_Gilmore: OK, time to put up the tree and spend the next six weeks scolding the cat for playing with the dangly remarkably-cat-toy-like ornaments.
@MrGeorgeWallace: I run a gambling ring where we throw humidifiers and dehumidifiers into a pit and let 'em fight that shit out.
@ventivodkacran: When someone yells "STOP!" I never know if it's Hammertime or if I should collaborate and listen.