@Tuna_Lover: Just spent $243.57 at the grocery store so the check out girl didn't think I was just buying KY and condoms.
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@LindaInDisguise: Facebook is the biggest whistle-blower of them all, telling people I saw their messages.
@notabeanie: DOC: good news is you'll make it ME: phew! DOC: ...into the the record book for stupidest way to die ME: *still vomiting marshmallows*
@wickedblondeone: I just found a quarter in the vending machine, if anyone is looking for a sugar mama.