@KeepCaIm: Keep calm and text a random number..."I'm pregnant"
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@LindaInDisguise: Me: We do *not* spit on our classmates! 5YO: Well, who DO we spit on, then? I miss the funny stuff my kids said when they were little.
@imence2: This guys talking about "Calm down, everything happens for a reason". Then he gets all angry when I punch him in the face. What a hypocrite.