@LoriLuvsShoes: So I told my husband that I have a TC and he said, "that's really cute. See if he wants to fund your shoe addiction"

@thatUPSdude: It's common knowledge talking shit will result in dental work.

@HiddleDeeDee: 7: Mama, are you lonely when we go to bed? Me: (Handle this like a great mom. Get the look off your face. Don't laugh.) Of course, sweetie.

@MarkAFuqua_Hunt: Hotel beds are often all the proof I need that Satan owns a mattress factory.

@jobless4eyes: What do we want? An Iphone for fat fingers! When do we want it? BOW!