@Danny_McH2O: Kids, no one will ever understand you like your high school love. Get pregnant and marry them right away. You know better than everyone.
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@SonOfCha: When I see a dog tied up outside a store I immediately assume it's been there for years & set it free.
@Jesssicle: The most exercise I get from my exercise ball is when I move it around in my apartment so that it's not in my way.
@huntigula: I take karate classes solely to fight off hobos who mistake my man bun for a delicious cinnamon roll