@KalvinMacleod: Kind of cruel that "stutter" has two syllables.
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@FloodyHippie: You don't need to put "narcissist" in your bio. This is twitter, that shit goes without saying.
@NotYourSoulmate: Some lady brought a gaggle of pre-teens to the movie, sat them down next to us & then sat elsewhere. I sold them all on the black market.
@MiahSaint: This Kit Kat commercial is making some awfully big assumptions about both my generosity and number of friends.
@theSwellMan: Probably the worst thing about dying a virgin would be all the dead terrorists that are waiting for you.