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@drayzze: "Knock knock."
@SteveKoehler22: Why not call baby pigs "hamlets" ?
@NolaChef504: When my boss is mad and takes it out on me, I do less work.
Can't reward bad behavior with a positive response.
Training works both ways
@Sickayduh: [First date]
"Ok. Don't let her know you're just 40 squirrels in human clothes"
"You said that out loud"
@KentWGraham: My wife and I have different beliefs about death. I want to be cremated when I die, and she wants to cremate me now.
@delmolition: Just bought Rosetta Stone for Starbucks.