@PimpBillClinton: Ladies, don't tell me you care about the environment if you don't support my "Share a Shower" water conservation program.
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@Sassafrantz: Relationship Status: I ate 7 bananas trying to get the new guy at work to notice me.
@kv8: Must suck to see your ex getting married. I wouldn't know, all mine have died in mysterious, firey car crashes.
@virtualhippie: Being high in front of your parents is like trying to do your best impression of yourself.