@lovemyboots111: Ladies, if your man says he'll fix it, he will. There's no reason to remind him every 6 months.
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@wolfpupy: the blood of the innocent will run in the streets? maybe it should get a car or at least use the sidewalk
@MatCro: [Couples therapy] WIFE: I hate the way he pronounces "food" like "feud". THERAPIST: And you, sir? ME: She's always in a bad mude.
@johnnyw1981: As I lay my phone down to sleep, I pray my brain won't think of tweets. If I die before I wake, I pray and hope my phone to break.
@ShortSleeveSuit: Vicodin: For when you absolutely have to apple scissors badger trampoline Connie seven accept substitute no steak fries