@slyoung5: Lady came to front door & asked if I'd donate to new pool they're building for kids. I told her to hang on & came back with a glass of water
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@SteveDutzy: I hate killing bugs so instead I spend hours trying to get it in a cup so I can toss it outside after accidentally taking off 3 of its legs.
@Shot_Of_Cabo: [ phone call ] Wife: You want the white 7" or the black 9". Me: The black 9". ..and if she wasn't tablet shopping this would be awkward.
@jwoodham: Reports are indicating that Ivanka Trump may take on some roles of the First Lady. Still no word on who will handle the duties of President.