@jordan_stratton: Laser hair removal? Uhhh, why would anyone with laser hair ever want to get it removed?
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@Jeffwni: [hears a voice in the sky] - Is it you? GOD?! [kneels] Voice: Could the idiot on platform 4 stop kneeling every time I make an announcement?
@biggarf: I wasn't good enough for you in high school but suddenly after 5 kids a husband and 3 boyfriends I'm starting to look good eh?