@Ellierocks2013: Last year I joined a support group for antisocial people.we haven't met yet.
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@flashember: [to wife on phone] yes spend all our life savings on honey W: but- PLS JUST DO IT *ends phonecall* BEAR [holding gun to my head]: u did good
@fro_vo: Me: my fitbit broke Sales Guy: how Me: i put it on my dog's tail and asked him who's a good boy Sales Guy: if i give you a new one can i see
@abhorrent_wife: There is no amount of money I wouldn't pay for a remote control that could walk itself over to me from the other side of the room.