@JamesonN7: Lawyers out there, if I see any of my Tweets being used on Comedy Central can I sue..... Oh you don't think that will ever be an issue, okay
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@JoParkerBear: How To Avoid Dating ●You're too young for me. ●I'm too young for you. ●I don't date men my age. ●Okay, but after I finish my antibiotics.
@Kalarlis: my bf is wonderful but he will never be as soft as my roommate's dog who moved out of the house WHY GREG WHY CAN'T YOU BE AS SOFT AS THE DOG
@jonnysun: GOD: [reviewing solar system] hmm… i'll give it 5 stars EARTH: [imediately starts screamig due to masive gravitational pull of 4 new stars]