@NicCageMatch: Learn from your mistakes. Make better & better mistakes until you're making the best mistakes possible.
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@amechamecha: After spending 20 minutes trying to get my girlfriends bra off, I decided to give up. I wish I'd never put it on in the first place..
@AGreaterMonster: *BUSTS DOWN DOOR* *Fires off jokes* *Kidnappers helpless in laughter* "..and that's how your granpappy saved baby Jesus." - Me, someday
@EndhooS: Fireman: [bursts in] EVERYONE OUT THIS IS NOT A DRILL Me: No its a hose lol [later] Cop: looks like he filled him with water til he exploded
@Vice_Queen: I'm at a second grade music recital and this is by far the most effective form of birth control I've ever tried.