@TheIronSherk: Learned today that it's about 12 min after realizing there's no TP in the stall that you ask yourself how important your socks really are
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@smashbrown_: Gas prices have me feeling like I'm robbing the gas station. "Just leave, before they change their mind."
@UNTRESOR: If a tree falls in the woods it should break into a light jog so it looks like it did it on purpose.
@Poutymcgee: See a penny pick it up... All day long you'll have.... A nagging feeling that the previous owner wasn't a "hand washer".
@decentbirthday: Just heard local reports of a stalker, which is funny because I watch everyone through their windows and none of them look suspicious