@MelKassel: LEONARDO DA VINCI: *on street corner* eeey girl! gimme a smile, girl! nah, not that big. make it cryptic, girl, like 'what is she thinking'
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Playing_Dad: [At dinner] Daughter: Daddy, how much of this meatball is meat? Me: Probably like 90% D: So it's 10% balls? Me: *spits out food*
@RealChrisChirdo: "I won't vaccinate my kids! It's not healthy and full of dangerous preservatives!!!" *gives kid a pop tart for breakfast*
@squirrel74wkgn: All these gifts today better get me laid. Wife (in a narrator's voice): ...but, then she overheard him talking...and he never did get laid.