@Dory: Let’s all take a minute and be thankful that bugs aren’t the same size as us
@droidbears: greys anatomy is so unrealistic. there is no way you can have sex in a place that smells like a hospital
@Reverend_Scott: Always bring a stopwatch to church, guys.
You want the girl that spends the longest amount of time in confession.
@cornlog: So rude of Ashton Kutcher to file divorce papers right before Demi Moore's 150th birthday.
@daemonic3: "Thanks, you've been a wonderful host!"
@DanMentos: Gene Hackman is my favorite actor whose name sounds like a job description at Monsanto