@SamGrittner: Life is what happens when you're busy choosing a filter for what already happened in life.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@causticbob: The Water Board sent me a notice saying that my bill was a year old, I obviously apologised for forgetting, and sent them a birthday card.
@Sassafrantz: Becky on FB is "too blessed to be stressed" so I told her that I slept with her boyfriend.
@alldrolledup: when your neighbor cuts his grass and suddenly your place looks like a good place to score meth