YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ThRealBallsDeep: Boss:Why is your voice gone? Are you ok? Me:*thinks back to me belting out Ariana Grande's "Dangerous Woman"* I'm ok...allergies are bad.
@Ristolable: "DO NOT HIT ME. THE TURTLES DO NOT HIT SPLINTER. I AM SPLINTER TO YOU." -real thing I just said to my son
@KeetPotato: [undoes GFs bra first time] "wow have you been practicing?" don't be ridiculous [me and dog exchange glances]