@candy_badass: Loneliness Status: Eating donuts and talking to the dog. He seems interested, but I think it's the donut.
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@Parentpains: If you didn't want me looking in your bedroom than you never should have put your window at the same height as my ladder.
@TheToddWilliams: My doctor won't go away. I know what you're thinking but he has been eating small pieces of apple over many decades to build up an immunity.
@jackiembouvier: [First date] Me: So, I've been married for 12 years - Him: You're married?? Me: Is that a problem?