@anerdonfire2: Look dude, I'm going to need to see alot more chest hair and jewelry if you want into my Disco party
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@YesitsAl: Wife thinks I was present for every conversation she's had with anyone, ever, and assumes I know what the hell she's talking about right now
@LuvPug: I used to wave my hands in the air like I just don't care, but now I just wave them because I get more steps on my FitBit
@iamspacegirl: ME *sees baby crab in stroller*: He's so cute! I just wanna rip his lil legs off dip em in butter and eat them! MOM CRAB *beaming*: thank u
@BBQJones28: For the record..when you get punched in the face..it doesn't make that movie sound...at all.