@protolalia: Looking for a job on Craigslist. A guy wants to pay $150 to borrow a valid driver's license to rent a car. What could possibly go wrong?
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@monicaheisey: my dad has been telling me for years about various friendly encounters with Mike, another resident of his apartment building he really likes and i found out yesterday that Mike is a dog
@iwearaonesie: My wife said I need to grow up. I was speechless. It's hard to say anything when you have 45 gummy bears in your mouth
@daemonic3: If I could have dinner with anyone, dead and alive, it would definitely be Schrodinger's cat.