@funnyordie: Lots of people comparing Trump to ISIS and Hitler. Wow. Take it easy, guys! That's not very nice to ISIS or Hitler.
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@Dunn_Right: Hey all you parents who recently named your kid Jax We get it you're unoriginal and watch SOA Hold on my daughter Grey's Anatomy is crying
@Phook75: Forgot to buy a gift for a friends Wedding. Luckily someone died at an intersection nearby so I scored a cool wooden cross and a teddy bear
@philyuck: ME: I'll sleep on it. MATTRESS SALESMAN: Ok. ME: So wrap it up. I'd like to sleep on it tonight. MATTRESS SALESMAN: Oh, you want the... ok.
@meganyyb: Hey couples on Facebook that share an account, so which one of you got caught having an affair?