@dance_blessed: Lust is not real love and Domino's is not real pizza but both are fine when you're drunk.
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@HelloJessicaFox: A little about me: I’m a beekeeper. I see a bee, I keep it. I don’t care whose bee it is. Should have been watching it better.
@eskimo_tekillya: I recently bought a corset to spice up my sex life. Once I've learned how to breathe in the damn thing I'll tell you how it worked out.
@o__0Dev: I tried a vegan recipe book last night. It was much tastier than any of the recipes in it.
@13spencer: Tonight's Golden Globes taught us that, no matter how much you spend on surgery, nobody looks good while sweaty.