@dance_blessed: Lust is not real love and Domino's is not real pizza but both are fine when you're drunk.
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@FlyJ_: My neighbor is a real douche & always cheating on his wife, so I changed my wifi to KARL IS CHEATING ON YOU AMY for when she needs my wifi.
@Ivsy01: Put all your neighbors names on your Halloween tombstones in your front yard and wink when you're outside and they walk by.
@mstluvstrinkets: I remember, before kids, saying funny things like, "my kids won't be watching TV and they most certainly won't be eating chicken nuggets!"