@jesse_street: MAGICIAN: Think of a number, any number.
ME: *thinks for a bit* …k
MAGICIAN: That is a letter.
ME: omg ur right
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@vanluvz1: I love the gym this time of year. The newbies make me look like a Victoria Secret model.
@adamrensch: *accidentally walks into women's restroom* *plays it cool* *sits down* *finds comfort here* *changes name to Janice* *is alive* *is free*
@_youhadonejob1: Chinese?
@Griffinreborn: In 2009 we lost Michael Jackson. Now we lost Neil Armstrong. We are running out of moon walkers
@BeagirlNJ: Top 5 things to ditch in 2017 5. Debt 4. People you don't like 3. Facebook 2. Drama 1. The bodies
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