@duplicitron: Mail some pirates a treasure map leading to the exact spot where you need a hole dug for a tree.
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@eliserose5: I need some sugar. Not the stupid kind that gives you mono, but the good kind that gives you diabetes.
@truegritrumble: DATE: Do you like sports? ME: *nervously* Sure. DATE: What's your favorite sport? ME: *panicking* Panicking.
@SemFitty: *wear sunscreen* *go up to a guy named Ray and punch him in the nose* *now laugh because sunscreen protects you from ultra violent Rays*
@Shanehasabeard: Did you know a hummingbird has to consume half its body weight in sugar every day and that I don't have to do that but I still also do that?