@BreadFoster: Man buns: Because girls want the convenience of a guy who always has a hair tie.
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@fightforfood: When you guys describe me to your families do you use the word tigress? I'd prefer if you included tigress
@soulindivision: "I have to go eat cake now", should be a perfectly valid reason for leaving a social occasion where cake has not been provided.
@schmuuur: I just ate what I thought was a feta cheese crumble from my salad off my shirt. Turns out it was deodorant. So how's your day going?
@phaggots: [texting my girlfriend] wyd? "Just finished my homework" Cool, Send a pic (; ? *gf sends a nude* Ewww wtf!! i meant of your homework!