@IGotsSmarts: Many rastafarian babies are born out of dreadlock.
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@LaziestCanine: [on intercom] Pilot: does anyone know how to land an airplane? asking for a friend, i swear
@AlanFelyk: Your daughter seems to have nice boyfriends. They all seem to be involved in community service.
@sssub23: I'm really not sure how many times I'll search for my phone with the flashlight on my phone before I realize I'm an idiot....