@TheWoodenslurpy: Marry a man who surrounds himself with good weather and can provide good weather for you and your children.
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@redherringbear: Back in college, I used to hang a sock on the doorknob when I wanted to signal my roommate that I had no idea how to fold laundry.
@Sickayduh: [NBA Postgame] *LeBron wearing his fake glasses* "Questions? Yes, Lois Lane from Daily Planet" "Yeah hi. I'll wait til LeBron comes out"
@TheHyyyype: CONDUCTOR: all aboard! ME: i'm pretty bored CONDUCTOR: no, i meant everyone on the train ME: oh, i'm sure they're bored too