@TheBrokenCrest: Me: *breathes* *gains weight*
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@Bdell1014: Having a crush on someone is so exciting. You know you'll end up ruining things like you always do, but how? The possibilities are endless.
@internetluke: [plane] "Is there a doctor on board?" Im a doctor "Okay quick the passenger is having a heart att- Of fine arts "What?" Doctor of Fine Arts
@TheMichaelRock: [at interview] Her: In three words or less, tell me why we should hire you. Me: I'm good with numbers.
@Chloestylo: When someone sneezes, I whisper, "Goes in tight.." It's actually German for "Bless you", but it sounds so naughty.